How can I convince my teen to do more around the house?

You can convince your teen to do more around the house by helping them understand the benefits for themselves, allowing them to feel involved in decisions, and giving them clear, realistic expectations built into their routine.

It is very rare for a teen to rush to help out with chores, and many parents feel as if they are in a constant battle. But nagging and battling may not actually work. Nonconfrontational approaches often work best, so make sure you stay calm and neutral as you explain why chores matter and the consequences of not doing them.

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What to do when your teen refuses to do chores?

If your teen refuses to help, try to step away from daily arguments and reset the approach. Calm conversations, clear expectations, and consistency tend to work better than constant reminders or conflict.

It may also be helpful to ask them why they are refusing to help. Are they tired, stressed out, or lacking time? Do they feel like they have too many chores?

You may want to:

• Have an open conversation: choose a calm moment to explain why these skills matter - not just for now, but for when they’re living independently at uni or somewhere else
• Make it relevant to them: talk about real-life benefits like having clean clothes, avoiding last-minute stress, and being a considerate housemate
• Create a simple schedule: agree on a few regular tasks that fit around their routine, so it feels manageable, not overwhelming
• Make it a team effort: doing chores together (like cooking or unloading the dishwasher) can make it feel less like a burden
• Offer small incentives: Offering things to motivate your teen can help - whether that’s extra screen time, a treat, or pocket money

Why is my teenager refusing to do any chores?

Teens often resist chores because they feel overwhelmed, want more independence, or don’t see the immediate benefit. It’s usually not about laziness - it’s about motivation, habits, and priorities.

Your teen may be refusing to do chores because:

• Big or unclear tasks can make it hard to get started, especially for teens with ADHD
• Being told what to do can lead to pushback as they develop independence
• Skills like cleaning and laundry don’t always feel urgent until they need them
• Friends, school, and downtime often take priority over household chores

Should teenagers have chores at home?

Yes - chores help teens build independence, responsibility, and the life skills they’ll need when they leave home.

Giving your teen responsibilities now is one of the best ways to prepare them for adult life. It’s not about making them perfect, it’s about helping them feel capable and confident managing their own space.

Examples of helpful chores include:

• Doing their own laundry
• Cooking a simple meal once a week
• Washing up or unloading the dishwasher
• Keeping on top of messy rooms
• Helping with food shopping or meal prep

What to remember when convincing your teen to help at home

It’s completely okay to want more support at home - especially after a long day at work. Parenting teens isn’t always easy, and finding that balance between helping them grow and letting them discover themselves at their own pace is difficult to navigate.

Whatever your parenting style is, encouraging your teen to take on more responsibility now will genuinely help them in the long run. With a mix of clear expectations, patience, and small steps, you can help them build skills without it turning into a daily battle.

If your teen needs a bit of extra motivation or guidance, introduce them to luna - a supportive space designed to help young people build confidence, independence, and everyday life skills.

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