What is co parenting?

Separated parents working together

Quick summary

• Co-parenting is when separated or divorced parents work together to raise their child despite living in different homes
• It focuses on communication, stability and putting the child’s wellbeing at the centre
• luna can support your daughter emotionally as she navigates two households, changing routines and big feelings

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What is co-parenting?

Co-parenting is a shared parenting arrangement in which two separated or divorced parents both remain actively involved in raising their child. 

It’s not about living together or agreeing on everything, it’s about:

• communicating respectfully
• sharing responsibility
• keeping routines predictable
• making decisions with the child’s best interests in mind

For teens and pre-teens, co-parenting can be especially helpful because the teenage years are already filled with change. 

Having stability across both homes can make a big difference to how supported and secure they feel.

What does co-parenting look like day-to-day?

Co-parenting varies across families, but common examples include:

Shared routines

Both homes follow similar expectations about bedtime, screens, homework or chores.

Joint decision-making

Big decisions – schooling, health, activities – are discussed together rather than unilaterally.

Smooth transitions

Parents communicate about what the child needs when moving between homes (school items, clothes, emotional needs).

Respectful communication

Even if parents disagree, conversations stay civil and focused on the child.

Showing unity

Teens know both parents are still a team – even if they’re no longer a couple.

Why co-parenting can be helpful for teens

Separation can be unsettling for young people, but co-parenting helps reduce uncertainty by providing:

• consistency
• stability
• predictable expectations
• reassurance that both parents remain involved

Teens may not always say it, but clear communication and collaboration between parents often make them feel safer and more supported during an already turbulent stage of life.

Common challenges of co-parenting

Even with the best intentions, co-parenting isn’t always easy.

Different parenting styles

One parent may be more permissive, the other more structured. (If you’re curious, our guides on permissive parenting and helicopter parenting may help.)

Emotional tension

Past relationship issues or even new present romantic relationships can spill into co-parenting conversations.

Inconsistent routines

If rules differ a lot between homes, teens may feel confused or conflicted.

Teen pushback

Teens may test boundaries or play parents against each other, especially when communication is strained.

None of these issues mean co-parenting is failing – they are simply signs that adjustments may be needed.

How to co-parent effectively

Healthy co-parenting doesn’t mean being perfect. It’s about being as consistent and child-focused as possible.

1. Keep communication predictable and calm

Use texts or shared calendars for logistics rather than emotional conversations.

2. Separate adult issues from parenting

Disagreements between parents shouldn’t become a burden on the teen.

3. Agree on a few non-negotiables

These might include safety rules, school expectations or screen time limits.

4. Encourage your teen to talk openly

Teens may feel caught in the middle – having a safe, neutral space to express feelings is important.

5. Be flexible when needed

Teens’ schedules, friendships and emotional needs shift quickly.

6. Focus on connection, not competition

Teens benefit when parents avoid comparing households or trying to “win” their approval.

How co-parenting feels from a teen’s perspective

Teens often say the hardest part is not the separation itself, it’s the tension or inconsistency between homes.

They may experience:

• guilt about enjoying one home more
• stress about switching environments
• pressure to keep both parents happy
• uncertainty about rules
• difficulty remembering what’s where (especially school or period items)
• hormonal and emotional shifts that make transitions harder

This is where luna can make a meaningful difference.

How luna can support your daughter through co-parenting

The teen years are emotional even in one household – two households can make things feel even more complicated.

luna helps by offering your daughter:

A neutral, safe space

She can ask questions anonymously and get doctor-reviewed support on periods, hormones, friendships, mood and growing up, without the pressure of choosing which parent to talk to.

Predictability across households

With mood and cycle tracking, your daughter can understand her symptoms and emotional patterns no matter which home she’s in.

luna also helps her plan for her periods if she’s started, which can make packing the right things to stay over at either house much more practical!

Private guidance during transitions

luna’s articles, videos and quizzes explain anxiety, stress and big emotions in ways teens relate to – helping her feel grounded on days she moves between homes.

Less parent conflict

When teens get reliable answers from experts, they’re less likely to become the “go-between” in difficult conversations.

Rated 4.8

Support your teen through it all with luna

Find out more

Co-parenting doesn’t require perfect harmony, just consistent care. Even small signs of teamwork from both parents can make a teen feel supported, secure and valued.

And with luna giving your daughter a private space to understand her feelings, her hormones and her changing world, she’s not navigating the transition between two homes alone.