How to talk to your daughter about her first period

Top tips from teen experts!

At luna, periods is the number one topic we’re asked about by teens in our app, and from our experience, we know that many tweens and teens have a lot of questions and worries about first periods specifically – it's a big milestone.

This can be anything from concerns about when it will happen to how it feels and what’s "normal" – it’s clear that this moment can be filled with uncertainty.

Talking to your daughter about her first period can feel a bit tricky. You might find yourself asking: when is the right time to talk about periods? What can I say? What do I need to know about first periods?

Based on what we’ve learned firsthand, we’re here to help you approach this conversation with confidence.

With these simple tips, hopefully you can create an open and honest dialogue that supports her without it feeling overwhelming or awkward for either of you.

Start the conversation early

Periods can start as early as 8 years old, so it’s a good idea to bring up the topic before it happens.

If you’re unsure when to start talking about it, you might want to look for signs your daughter is about to start her period.

This doesn’t need to be a big, sit-down talk, either. You can ease into it with casual chats about changes in her body, like growing taller or needing deodorant. These small conversations can help introduce periods naturally.

It doesn’t all need to be covered at once too – by starting early, you give her time to get comfortable with the idea and ask questions when she’s ready.

Create a safe and open space

It’s really important that your daughter feels she can come to you with any questions or worries.

Perhaps you could let her know you’re happy to talk about anything to do with periods and that there’s no such thing as a silly question.

Whether she’s worried about what period blood looks like or unsure about which products to use, it’s key she knows you’re a safe person to ask. You can also check out your daughter’s first period: dos and don’ts for some extra guidance on HOW to talk about this – there's a lot of terms that teens nowadays dislike which we've rounded up for you.

Some girls have loads of questions, others might need more time. Either way, just making sure she feels comfortable coming to you is what matters.

Use simple, clear words

When talking about periods, it’s best to use clear, straightforward language. Avoid using coded phrases like “that time of the month” or "Aunt flo" which can make the whole thing feel secretive or awkward.

Stick to using words like “period,” “menstruation,” and “puberty” to keep things simple and easy to understand. You can also help her understand the stages of female puberty to give her a fuller picture of the changes her body is going through.

It’s also helpful to explain that having periods is a natural part of growing up, just like other body changes. This can help remove any embarrassment or confusion.

Answer her questions honestly

Your daughter might have a lot of questions, and they might range from practical things like “What if I get my period at school?” to “What does a period feel like?” Try to answer her questions as simply and honestly as you can, without feeling like you need to cover every detail right away.

It’s okay if you don’t have all the answers – maybe you can find out together or you can recommend our app, luna, to her – it's full of information about this!

Help her feel prepared

One way to help your daughter feel less anxious about her first period is to make sure she’s prepared.

A good idea is to create a little first period kit for her to keep in her school bag. This could include some pads, tampons, or whichever products she feels comfortable using, along with spare underwear and wipes.

You could also offer to take her shopping for period products. Don’t worry if she’s not up for that yet – just having a few options at home for her to choose from when she’s ready can be really helpful.

If she’s unsure about which products to try, our guide on choosing period products for tweens and teens can help. There's also plenty of information in the luna app for her to understand more about using each one.

Talk about feelings and what to expect

Periods can bring some changes to mood and emotions, which might feel confusing for your daughter. It’s really common to feel more sensitive or grumpy around this time. Try to let her know this is normal and nothing to worry about.

Everyone’s period experience is different as well. Some people have heavy periods, while others have light ones; some get cramps, others don’t.

With that in mind, you might also want to encourage her to try a period tracking app and start tracking even before she starts – in the luna app they can also track their moods and discharge before starting periods; this can help her understand her cycle better and prepare for what to expect.

It’s also a common myth that a daughter’s periods may exactly mimic her mum’s in terms of heaviness or painfulness – whilst this can happen, it's not definitely the case so it’s a good idea to let her experience periods herself without any expectation.

Respect her privacy and pace

Try not to share details about her period with others without her permission, even with family members, for example in a group chat. It’s a personal experience, and letting her decide who to tell helps her feel in control.

Also, while luna knows that every teen has different needs, ideally try not to don't push her into conversations she’s not ready for – let her guide how much she wants to talk and when. If she doesn’t want to dive into a big discussion right away, that’s totally fine. Just let her know you’re there when she’s ready.

Occasionally, the first period may not be as your daughter expected – she may be unsure if it's blood or brown discharge or if it is even vaginal particularly, as at first the period may be very light. By speaking to her beforehand about periods she will know she can approach you if she isn’t sure if she is having her first period or not.

Reassure her there’s no "right" time

One of the biggest worries for girls is whether they’re starting their period at the "right" age.

You can reassure her that periods can start anytime between 8 and 17 years old, and all of that is completely normal.

Whether she’s one of the first in her friend group or one of the last, her body will start when it’s ready.

If she hasn’t started her period by age 15 or if she hasn’t shown any signs of puberty by age 13, it might be worth talking to a doctor, but try to stay calm about it – it’s usually nothing to worry about.

Encourage a positive view

Periods are sometimes seen as something negative or embarrassing, but they don’t have to be.

Try to help your daughter see them as just another part of life – something her body does naturally.

You don’t need to overdo it, but focusing on the positives, like how it’s a sign of growing up, can help her feel more comfortable.

At the same time, it’s okay to acknowledge that periods can be a bit of a hassle. It's about striking the balance.

Final thoughts...

Talking to your daughter about her first period can be hard, but hopefully these tips have offered some ideas on how you can help her feel more confident and prepared for this new stage in life. Your support and understanding will make a big difference as she learns to manage her period now and in the future.

Why not support your teen with luna premium?

Our app, luna, has dedicated advice on this topic which can help them feel more empowered through adolescence.

You can think of luna as a modern, digital approach to wellbeing – it’s cost-effective, verified by doctors and safeguarding experts, and has a direct line into the biggest concerns facing teens today – so it’s actually addressing what they need advice on, when they need it.

If you’ve been looking for an antidote to the misinformation and negativity shared on social media or forums, you can get luna for your teen via our luna premium page for the price of a coffee each month or manage their subscription by downloading luna yourself and signing up as a parent (it's "we are luna" in app stores).